Being an Arsenal fan these days


In Arsene’s 1000th game in charge, Arsenal traveled to Stamford Bridge to face Jose’s inform Chelsea for yet another London derby. Having edged Tottenham with an early Rosicky dream strike, the men in red knew what was at stake; the race to the coveted title was still very on. If they could get a positive result on this one, they would send a clear message to teams on top that Arsenal still has something to fight for.
Only that they didnt.

As an arsenal fan it’s hard to look at your team go down 4-0 at half time. In what was supposed to be a fantastic game of open attacking play, the north London giants were already limping with ten dejected looking men. The sad reality was that it was not the first time it happened this season.

I feel being an arsenal fan is like being married to a girl who you absolutely love, have amazing time in bed, spend fantastic time together but a girl who occasionally goes mental and slaps you in public real hard for trying to buy her a nice pair of shoes. A girl who cooks the most amazing dish for you but then uses the same utensil to knock you down cold. Physically and mentally.

Basically, a girl with DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder).

I looked up for the formal definition and this is what it had to say:

“Dissociative identity disorder (formerly known as multiple personality disorder or split personality disorder) is a mental illness in which a person has at least two distinct personalities. Symptoms and signs include lapses in memory, feeling unreal, blackouts in time, hearing voices in their head that are not their own, not recognizing themselves in the mirror, and finding items in one's possession but not recalling how they were acquired. Treatment usually involves psychotherapy, medications, and sometimes hypnosis.”

Don’t believe me?
It is pretty easy to relate this to loss to Chelsea and last minute suicide goal to Swansea.
what symptoms you ask?

Well..

Regarding lapses in memory: Arsenal can’t remember the last time Arsenal played such bullshit.
Regarding feeling unreal: Oh yeah, staring at the field screen which marks a hugely annoying 4-0 at half time with 10 men does feel rather unrealistic.
Regarding blackouts in time: Ask that to Flamini. Injury time goals are painful but suicides? It just blows. 
Regarding hearing voices in their head: All-the-time they were out their passing the ball around like 5 year olds.
Regarding not recognizing themselves in the mirror: Big time!

Don’t get me wrong, it’s great that arsenal had been in the title race until that game with key players all ‘out injured. We have managed to score some fantastic tiki-taka goals, some goals that other teams can only dream about, but it is largely frustrating to see your team pussy out without a fight.

Better get the FA cup. 9 years without a trophy is starting to take toll on us.

Comments

  1. I've not seen a this beautiful piece of writing explaining what we feel.. Well said Abhas #ohtobeagooner

    ReplyDelete
  2. 4 goals before halftime.????? what about 4 goal in 20 minutes?

    ReplyDelete

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