How Rhinos [and Hobbe(s)] Shit

“You remember the guy in Into the Wild who goes alone and tries to mingle with nature and all that stuff?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Well, he was not alone.”

“Wait…We ARE talking about the same movie right?”

“Yeah, is there another one?”

“I don’t know, you said he wasn’t alone.”

“He wasn’t.”

“Oh so you mean he was living with the animals around him? I didn’t know you had an animal sense of humor”

“No, I meant with the camera crew around him”

“…., I am done talking to you”

There are times when you go crazy, even when you are sober. I mean I don’t always go bonkers when I mix rum and coke and vodka and orange but yeah you know what I mean. You don’t? ok so let me lay it down for you in normal, proper colloquial language.

So last time I mixed drinks I clearly remember explaining how Rhinos get poached due to their shitting habits to some people from france, uk, korea and the us in boss’s party. You don’t? ok, so lets suppose we have Rhino named Hobbe. Like all other rhinos, Hobbe has this habit of taking a dump only on a particular place. So particular, that every time he needs to shit, Hobbe goes back to the same old dirty place. Lets suppose we name that spot in that Jungle as A. Now, this is rather easy for poachers with a little Hobbe knowledge to know where to sit and wait and poach. Funnily enough, Hobbe makes the job all too easy. Whenever he/she needs to excrete, Hobbe turns Hobbe's grey ass towards the direction of A (when he is near his shit spot A) and moves backwards, slowly and elegantly. As Hobbe has his/her eyes away from the spot, he/she never knows what hit him/her. Job well done.

This shows aspects of clear thinking. Therefore, proving the point that in fact, you can think straight even with alcohol in your system. But then you go Judo your boss again, which was pretty ugly (he said I was getting better at that!), and then all the "clear thinking" goes up in the air…puffff…just like that.

I don’t know where this blog post is heading so I might just as well end it here.

And NO I am not drunk right now. Although I cant deny I had a cup of milk. cold milk is THE thing.